“When beautiful people cry, do they cry beautiful tears? This is, of course, a trick question. They have nothing to cry about for they are beautiful.” 

In the distant year of one million and one A.D the final problem faced by humanity is a real doozy. The epidemic of world ugliness. For what is the point of flying cars and robot gas station attendants if you are ugly? Thankfully, there is the ‘918th Spring has Sprung: Beautiful Convention to Cure World Ugliness’ of which the disintegration of this terrible dilemma is the sole purpose. Join your host, the Gorgeous Hamish Gorgeous, as two brilliant scientists, Dr Waldo Wonderful and Dr Fergus Fantastic battle it out to decide once and for all who is the most helpful to society (making physically unattractive people less unattractive). Laser beams, ugliness detectors and swimsuit competitions abound in this pageant to end all pageantry. 

An ode to excess, Spring has Sprung explores the engorged vapidity of the media and the world it propagates. Utilising conventions of beauty pageants across the world, the performers sing, dance, yell and move to the point of exhaustion. To the backdrop of tinsel, sticky glitter and three-inch thick foundation Spring has Sprung seeks to explore the psychology within the quest to prove you are enormous revealing how tiny you truly are.

Created and Performed by Cooper Donald McDonald, Ludomyr Kemp-Mykyta and Harry McGee

2024 Performed at Testing Grounds

Nominated Green Room Awards 2025 - Outstanding Production, Outstanding Ensemble, Outstanding Direction

Documentation by Abdul Min Muhaimin